With the sad news of the murder
of a Renton mother, concerns about dating, and especially online dating, are probably
foremost in many people’s minds. There may be no single action that guarantees
absolute safety, but new technology can help people who are part of the dating
scene to research the backgrounds of potential dates. Those who advocate
against domestic violence probably would emphasize that we should work towards “a
world where there is no violence against women.” Until that world exists, here
are some tips to help protect yourself:
·
Check social media, Twitter, Facebook, Linkedin,
to verify information that the individual has told you.
·
Learn how to use Google Image Search (https://images.google.com/).
·
Use free public records searches on the
Washington State court database (http://dw.courts.wa.gov/?fa=home.namesearchTerms).
·
If you have serious concerns, the Washington
State Patrol Identification and Criminal History Section (WASIS) can provide
criminal history conviction records for $12 online at https://fortress.wa.gov/wsp/watch/.
Private services such as Intelius (https://www.intelius.com/)
can provide a complete background for $50.
·
Tell friends where you are going and who you are
going with.
·
Meet in a public place.
·
When you can, get the full name of the person you
are dating and find out their workplace.
·
Have frank conversation early to establish rules
of consent around intimacy.
·
Be aware of early signs often exhibited by domestic
abusers: possessiveness, entitlement and controlling behavior.
The following article in the
Seattle Times provides thoughtful observations about online dating:
Washington State Coalition
Against Domestic Violence: